How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
The way you usurp my husband for 15 hours a day, six days a week. It just melts my heart.
You make my husband so happy. He sings your praises in his sleep. Oh wait, he doesn’t get much of that. You are all consuming, the house guest that lingers past Christmas and eats all the food in the fridge. Oh, but we don’t hold it against you. Stick around a while. Pull up a chair. You are our friend. Just ask the children, who think they saw a glimpse of their father…last week. They say your name with reverence, cross stitch it into their pillows. Dissertation, dissertation, dissertation.
Never part from us. If my husband can’t be at my side, then by golly, you can. For life. That nebulous cluster of ideas just waiting to be splashed across the page.
This is true love, I tell you.
And also, April Fool’s.
P.S. We celebrated the day with cinnamon/salt toast and whoopie cushions, per tradition. What tricks did you play on this undervalued holiday?